Here I am at a weekend retreat at a conference centre, and we're having a blast. But it's funny because I don't know if I would come to this on my own.
I am really a party pooper for two reasons:
1. I need sleep 2. I can't sleep with noise around me.
Which means that if I'm in a room with people who are snoring, I get frustrated. Then mad. Then desperate. By 3 in the morning I've crossed the line from sane to insane.
And sometimes you can end up in a room with women who want to talk until 2 in the morning and who are hyper. And I can't handle that either. I need to sleep.
I think retreats are great for drawing women together and forming community. And the speakers are often wonderful (shameless self-plug there). But you have to know your limits.
Whenever I go to a retreat I always try to see if I can have my own room, but then I look like a debutante or something. So it's quite difficult. As a speaker I always get my own, so I do enjoy retreats then.
I have a similar problem on missions trips, so I've come to insist on my own room or sharing with my family rather than a bunch of women. I just need to sleep.
What about the rest of you? How do you handle it? Am I just hopelessly pathetic?
Retreat? That's what I call going to the grocery store alone. :) I did go to a women's conference once and shared two rooms with several women. I would prefer alone but it was not economical to do so. :)
I am with you. I like many aspects of retreats, but yes, I like my rest. And if I do stay up really late chatting with my roommate, then I'd like to spend my free time the next day napping. :-)
lol... I am so with you... I love people... but we all have our sleep habits.. and when you want to get rest it is very hard to adjust to someone else's habits.
I used to be that hyper person that wanted to talk all night. Then I had kids and I hit my 30s. Now I want talk, it just needs to end by 10pm. When I go on retreats I try to find like-minded women to share the room with me. No late nights, no snoring, no bathroom hogs. Still, I should probably focus less on me and more on what the "retreat" is offering. Time to fellowship with other believers, time to focus on God, time to help sisters going through a difficult time, time to share the gospel. It's not about me- it's ALL ABOUT HIM!
You made me giggle. I too need my sleep. So no, you are not alone or even hopeless pathetic. If I don't get sleep (at least 5 hours) I don't function very well.
I was glad to read this. I have felt significant guilt over my desire to not attend women's retreats. I thought I was the only one who does not care for them. I have even wondered if it makes me a bad Christian. I attended one and I was more stressed out by the time I was done there. Then, the next time my church was having one I was pressured on a continual basis to sign up..."You'll have so much FUN!!!" and I simply knew I would not have so much fun. When I declined, I was harassed further. Some people are energized and relaxed by that kind of thing...for me it's the opposite.
Oh how ironic you would post this now, as I was on a retreat last weekend also. I share your frustrations (although, as a snorer, probably cause them too!)
I think it all comes down to planning, communication, and neutral space! I mean... the sleeping rooms should be quiet, AND there should be space for the night owls and the early birds to BE, and not disturb others.
I went to bed by about 10pm, and listened to the others, (in the rooms on either side of mine) talking, laughing, singing, until the wee hours... But when I snuck out of bed at 6am, to go to the "common room" to have devotions, there were people sleeping on the couches!
So... I need to communicate with the people in charge, and they need to communicate with all the ladies attending about what the expectations are.
Am I being too self-righteous here? Seems like the night owls seem to take for granted their 'right' to be up (and noisy) until quite late, but the early birds are resented.
Also, I have come to the realization that - in spite of how much I enjoy other people - I am an introvert. I'm not shy, by a long shot, BUT I recharge by being alone, not by being in a group. Maybe Catherine R feels the same?
I want to go on the retreat and build the relationships, but I also need those quiet times and spaces to 'regroup'... I don't want to be in the midst of everything all day!
I'm probably not a very good judge for this as I have to be up with the women chatting. I get so little fellowship with women all alone without interruptions that when it's going on I have a hard time going to bed.
I have shared a bed at retreats and shared rooms.
My preference is to have my own bed, but I can deal with sharing a bed. I don't mind sharing a room, in fact I like it, but I am a light sleeper too and there is nothing worse than laying in bed awakened by noises and wanting to sleep.
My friend used to take her Tylenol PM with her to retreats to knock her out to sleep. She would wake up refreshed, not even aware of what went on around her.
I do LOVE the retreat setting.
We had our women's retreat the end of Feb. and I loved that Papa gave me the opportunity to speak. It was a treasure to my heart.
About Me: I'm a Christian author of a bunch of books, and a frequent speaker to women's groups and marriage conferences. Best of all, I love homeschooling my daughters, Rebecca and Katie. And I love to knit. Preferably simultaneously.
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Retreat? That's what I call going to the grocery store alone. :) I did go to a women's conference once and shared two rooms with several women. I would prefer alone but it was not economical to do so. :)