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Weekend Ponderings
Hello all!

Regina is COLD. Very COLD. And I forgot my hat. I do, however, have yarn and knitting needles, so I shall have to make one today.

I'm here speaking (five times over three days). I've got two down, three to go. So far it's been very rewarding, and I love the feedback I get from people. I love the actual events; I don't like the traveling so much. But apparently my kids are decorating the house while I'm gone, so I get to come home to Christmas!

I'm feelng much better about life, too, because I've had the chance to knit in the hotel room off and on. I don't know why I don't knit more when I'm at home. It always relaxes me. So all you women reading this this weekend: get off the computer, stop shopping, and go knit or crochet or scrapbook or something. Even if it's only for two hours. You'll feel better.

Here's a question for you: I think God's been talking to me about fostering lately. It's a long story, and I'll have to share it more fully when I'm not on a public computer in a hotel lobby, but I've been praying about it quite a bit. So any of you have any thoughts, either positive or negative? Have any of you fostered? Love to hear about it!

Have a great weekend!

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At 12:20 AM , Blogger Stacy said…

I commented a bit about fostering in your blog post about earning money from home (fostering was one of the suggestions you listed). I work for an agency that licenses foster homes (although it isn't what I do personally). I have worked with several foster families though. Some of these may or may not apply in Canada- I don't know how your system compares to what we have in the US.
The first thing to know is that you have to be prepared for your house and your life (past and present) to absolutely be an open book. You will be asked about your past, your finances, your marriage, and almost anything else you can imagine. Your home will have to undergo an inspection by the state initially and then annually (I think) after that. Another thing to keep in mind is that kids are generally removed from their homes for a reason. Nearly all have been abused or neglected in some way, and many have serious issues. Managing those issues is more work than many people expect initially.
That being said, fostering can be a great way to make a real difference for a kiddo in need.
If you'd like to talk about this further, feel free to drop me a comment or e-mail (the address is in my blog info).


At 3:33 PM , Blogger Mrs W said…

We prefer to look into adoption but I guess fostering would be ok so long as you don't get too attached so that your heart breaks when they take the child away. There can be issues but there can be those with birth children.


At 4:30 PM , Blogger Herding Grasshoppers said…

Are you thinking of "straight" fostering or foster-adopt?


At 6:02 PM , Blogger LAURA said…

I think the world needs more good solid families to become foster families! I don't think it would be an easy thing but I think that it would be an amazing opportunity to help a kid out. I often think about it myself but I am not at the right place in my life yet. Someday though!


At 9:36 AM , Blogger Sheila said…

I'm just thinking of fostering. I won't rule out adoption, but I'm not thinking along those lines.

At this point in my life my children are older and would be a help. I would never foster kids that are the same age as my own, let alone older, so I think waiting until they're older is probably a good thing. But now they are older. So if we're going to do it, I should get started! But we're still just praying about it.

Our lives being an open book doesn't bother me much. When we speak at marriage conferences we already spill our deepest secrets, and I spill everything in my weeky column, anyway. So that's okay. It's more the disruption in my schedule. That's what I'm praying over!


At 10:57 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said…

I'm going to be blunt. Don't do it unless you know your children can handle the stress that will come into your home. Don't do it if you can't stand the thought of "losing" a child. Don't do it if you can't handle the thought of a child leaving your safe care to go back to the neglect they came from.

I was raised in a home that had foster children most of my life. Until I was about 14. They were never older than me...I'm the oldest of my sisters. The oldest child we ever had was about 10. To say it affected me and my sisters would be an understatement. We were subjected to things that our little minds never should have been. It wasn't the foster children's faults but they came from BAD situations. Now mind you my parents didn't tell us everything. They protected us as best they could. Often times we would hear the horrors from the children themselves. They would just blurt out in the middle of dinner or the grocery daddy hurt me by______. It was heart wrenching and terrifying as a child.

I can remember one little boy who was 6 years old that thought it was normal to show his private parts to everyone and ask them to touch them. It was his life he knew no better. Still disarming though for my parents who had daughters. They had to have him moved to another home. We had newborn babies that were going through drug withdrawal from their mothers being on drugs while pregnant. You will never forget the sound of them screaming and crying. Ever. I can still hear it. It rocks your soul. I remember these three sisters we cared for that kept coming to us and then being sent back to the neglect. The last time they came to us the 5 year old had the mark of an iron on her little arm. That was 25 years ago and I can still picture it.

These images and so many more horrible ones I wouldn't mention here are forever etched in my mind. I know my sisters were just as affected. I believe we were forced to grow up a little too soon and lost some of our childlike innocence of the world. It caused a lot of different fears for each of us that we all still cope with. And I know my parents had good intentions and helped many, many children over the years. So please take what I'm saying in the spirit it's intended. I think people who foster are blessings to these children. They are needed in a desperate way. Who else could help these children? So I am not knocking foster care. Not in the least bit! What I am asking is, having been a child who lived with it, gravely consider the impact it might have on your own girls. You cannot undo the things they will be see and hear. When you bring that into your home it is much different than visiting a soup kitchen or orphanage. You live 24/7 with children who are very much not children anymore. Children that wake in the night screaming. Children that hide in corners and won't speak or let you touch them. Children that won't eat without vomiting. Children who you will grow to love and when they leave your sob for days praying they won't be hurt this time. I've got a LOT of brothers and sisters out there that I pray are still alive. I've never forgotten them or their stories. I couldn't if I tried.

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About Me

Name: Sheila

Home: Belleville, Ontario, Canada

About Me: I'm a Christian author of a bunch of books, and a frequent speaker to women's groups and marriage conferences. Best of all, I love homeschooling my daughters, Rebecca and Katie. And I love to knit. Preferably simultaneously.

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