As I reported earlier this summer, my husband and I are in a race to see who will lose 10-15 pounds first. I'm aiming for 10, he's aiming for 15. I like to tell myself that it's not about vanity. My mother, after all, started having real issues with her weight in her forties, and I don't want to get like that. Keith has genes which easily lead him to being a little heftier. So we want to stay healthy.
But I also do want to look nice. I like looking pretty. And just because I'm married--or perhaps because I'm married--I try a little harder. I think looking nice for your man is a good thing, because it keeps the marriage fresh, and I want him to enjoy coming home to me.
I do, however, feel the tension between vanity and health, and nowhere more so than when I think of the message I'm sending my girls and their friends. I certainly don't want them to think that my self-esteem is primarily in how I look, or that they need to be super skinny to be worth something. Enough negative messages about beauty pervade our culture that I don't want to add to them.
Yet I know that my girls, and their friends, do need to understand some basic things about health.
They are growing up in a culture that eats for pleasure far more than other cultures did, because we have so much food. I eat when I'm bored sometimes, too. Don't you? You have nothing to do, so the first thought that comes into your head is, "what's in the fridge"? Many of our children naturally think of food, too, when they're bored, and hence so much of their social life exists around food.
A dear woman I know who heads up a ministry aimed at junior high kids recently told me about a day she spent with several girls, where all the girls did was want to eat. They ate a huge breakfast--far larger than this woman ate herself--and then an hour later asked when the next snack was. Everytime food was brought out they grabbed handfulls of it and stuffed it in, and consumed just as large a lunch. She figures they ate as many calories by 11 that morning as she normally eats all day. How do you respond?
Obviously you could stop providing so much food for kids like this at events, because it really isn't necessary. But that doesn't stop the problem that many children don't seem to have a switch that says, "I'm full now". They love the feeling of stuffing themselves, and the idea that "I am not particularly hungry right now" has never stopped them from eating before, so why should it now?
So here's my question: how do you address that in, let's say, a church setting? How do you talk to kids about health without it becoming an issue about losing weight or being a particular body size? We can talk all we want about how the body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, and how we should treat it well, but that doesn't even work for most adult women who struggle with our weight. Even right now, as I type this, I am resisting the temptation of going and getting a bowl of ice cream, because I know I'm not hungry. I just had a huge dinner. But I would love some ice cream anyway.
Instead I'm going to pour myself a glass of water and drink all of it before I eat another thing. Usually when I drink, I stop thinking about food. Yet many of our children have it even worse than I do, because they've grown up eating constantly. They're not necessarily taught at home to resist eating if they're already full. They're given junk at home quite often. How do you teach them otherwise?
When our oldest was around 7, a little friend down the block used to hang out at our house constantly. I still remember the day she ate her first stick of celery. She didn't know what it was. The only vegetables she had ever eaten were carrots and cucumber. And she had never eaten any cooked (unless you count french fries).
We served her stew one night and she didn't know what to do with it, though once she tried it she liked it.
So imagine a youth group where kids don't know what celery is, where the greatest social pastime is eating, and where nobody has ever learned to say "no" to inner cravings. What do you do? How do you teach kids the proper way to think of food? I'd love to know your thoughts!
A few weeks ago Mary Ostyn joined us! Mary is the mom of a busy family of 10, and she's written a number of books on how to juggle that many kids and still have an awesome family life.
One of the things that I'm always amazed at in our Twitter conversations with all the friends I have is how many of you moms out there are so frugal! You know where to get the best deals, and you know how to stretch a dollar. So you're going to really appreciate this interview today. So let's get started.
Mary, you’ve written a book that many of my readers will just drool over, called Family Feasts for $75 a Week. Are you serious? Can you feed that many that cheaply without resorting to all lentils and dried beans?
The $75 a week quoted in my book is for a family of 4. With 10+ people to feed, I spend more like $200 a week. But most of them eat like adults—I don’t think many people could feed the numbers I do for that amount. And we eat really well—lots of good tasting food, lots of variety. I could get by on a little less if we needed to—in fact, one month every year I challenge myself to spend as little as possible. Last year I fed our whole family for a month for $350. But it would be hard to feed that many people every month for that cost, and I don’t think our diet would be as varied
I think if more people realized that if you plan your meals and plan your shopping, you could live for so much less, there would be less of a need for two incomes. Do you think that groceries is one of the main ways that people throw money away?
Absolutely. If your budget is tight, look at your grocery spending first. I wrote my book to help the ‘average’ family waste less money. But I’ve had confirmed tightwads tell me they learned new tricks from my book. I think that just goes to show that most of us could be spending less, whether we realize it or not
I have to admit, Mary, that I have expensive tastes. I like salmon, but it ain’t cheap. What do you do with foods that you just can’t afford? Do you ever treat yourself?
I love salmon too, and I splurge once a month or so. (It’s generally cheapest in the freezer case, by the way!) The trick is to balance your splurges with affordable meals. For every splurge meal I serve 2-3 vegetarian or almost-vegetarian meals. For example, potato corn chowder and pasta carbonera can both be made with a dollar’s worth of bacon, and yet the flavours are very rich and satisfying.
Another trick is to incorporate a flavor you love in a more affordable form. We eat steak maybe 4 or 5 times a year – it’s just too expensive to be a regular at our house. But I make a wonderful steak fajita with caramelized onions and bell peppers, served in flour tortillas with salsa and sour cream. That meal offers the flavour of steak for half the cost
Restaurants are so expensive, especially with large families, but it’s hard to cook all the time. Do you have a plan so that on those nights when you just want a treat or a break, you can get one inexpensively? Do you make up frozen meals for that purpose, or do you have another trick up your sleeve?
I love to cook, but I have days where I’m burned out too. At least once a week I make a pot of soup big enough to last two meals. Once a week I also double a casserole recipe, and stick the second one in the freezer. I try to have 2-3 casseroles in the freezer all the time, for variety.The crock pot can be a time saver on a busy day. And almost every meal, I make 2 or 3 servings extra. Then a couple times a week I serve ‘pot-luck’ for lunch. I pull all the leftovers out of the fridge and let kids pick what they want to zap in the microwave. Like you mentioned, planning really is at the heart of keeping the grocery budget in check.
You have a daughter who is married now. Is she frugal, too?
I think so. Once before she and her husband were married, they went to the store for candy. They opted for the bulk food bins and their entire purchase totalled 37 cents. I laughed when they told me that story. Of course that they’re buying more than candy they’re spending more. But they’re doing a great job being careful with their money. Last summer Amanda canned fruit and made jam. And she’s always trying out new recipes, expanding her repertoire. I think that’s a big key to being content with eating at home: mix it up, keep it interesting, both for the cook and for the rest of the family.
I know you'll love this book! I'm excited to get my hands on it, and Mary has generously offered one as a prize to a commenter! So leave a comment, and in one week, on April 12, we'll draw for a winner!
While you're busy leaving a comment, though, why not leave us your favourite frugal grocery tip, too? I have a couple that I'll leave for you:
1. Don't buy cereal. It's horrendously expensive. Make up your own pancake mix, or choose smoothies for breakfast instead.
2. Make lots of soups. They last a long time, and you can use leftover meats to fill them out. They're cheap and filling! We often do a potato-leek soup with homemade buns and salad as a vegetarian meal.
Now, what are yours? And good luck on the contest!
UPDATE: Do read the comments! Great tips there! Here's a really good one from Charline, that I try to emulate, too:
I cook something big and prepare extra potatoes, then I stretch it as long as I can by using everything up in very simple recipes. For example: Roasted chicken with sides of potatoes and carrots on the first night; using the liquid, some leftover chicken (with fresh potatoes), I can make a soup; using half of the leftover potatoes (with cream corn and hamburg), I have sheppard's pie; using the second half of the potatoes with leftover chicken and carrots, fried together in a pan with salt and pepper, I have what we call hash; and then with whatever chicken that's left, we can make sandwiches. So, with only a few extra ingredients, a very large meal can make an additional 4 to 5 meals.
Now read the comments, and remember to leave one if you want to win!
It's understandable. Modern families are busy. Sometimes both parents work and sometimes get home at different times. But even if you're home during the day it's still hard to find energy to cook every night, or even work out the logistics of when dinner is going to get made and consumed! Children have activities to go to, and Mom's got to drive them all over the place. Who's got the time and energy to even cook dinner every single night?
I know it's tough, but few things in parenting are more important. Eating together is good for you and your family. Inside jokes, laughter, and deep discussions flow from dinner times. Family devotions and family games nights naturally follow. You build the family identity. So you better make time and find the energy to make home-cooked meals and sit down and eat together more often.
Researchers have found many benefits to home-cooked meals. Watch this video to learn about some of them. In my own experience, though, there are many more. Here are 24 reasons I have found to share family meals more often:
1. Families who eat together eat healthier, because home-cooked food is healthier than fast food.
2. Family meals allow busy families to catch up with each other.
3. Young children learn a lot of verbal skills just by eating with their family members.
4. It gives everyone a chance to unwind after a busy day.
5. Having family meals more often forces you to end your working day and other obligations in time for dinner.
6. Home cooked meals are not only healthier, they're also cheaper than takeout food or eating out.
7. Eating together forces everybody to tell stories. And even if your 7-year-old son punctuates those stories with fart jokes, at least he's learning how to communicate!
8. Cooking at home motivates you to be creative with your meal planning and cooking.
9. Children can get involved in cooking meals. We decided to teach the kids to cook one meal a year after age 10. So at 11 they can make one thing, at 12 they can make two things, and by the time they leave home they have a meal for every day of the week--plus company!
10. Cooking and eating together creates happy childhood memories.
11. Eating together is an opportunity to explore different cuisines.
12. Eating with your family is more fun than eating in front of the television (or the computer).
13. Eating together gives parents a chance to talk about current events from their point of view, injecting their personal values without giving a lecture.
14. Eating together helps family members bond and get to know each other better.
15. You'll be surprised what your kids reveal when you're in a relaxed environment, such as a family meal.
16. Kids are less likely to roll their eyes when you reminisce and tell stories from your childhood while eating a meal together.
17. Family meals can be good teaching moments, even for small children. My toddler learned how to count by counting after-meal treats on his high chair.
18. Eating together is a good opportunity to teach and model good manners.
19. Family meals give a good transition from work or school to home life.
20. Family meals are also good times to share music together.
21. Family meals teach everyone valuable life skills, such as sharing and taking turns.
22. Stopping and sitting down to a meal gives everyone a chance to quiet down and regroup.
23. Family meals provide an additional occasion for family members to pray together.
24. Eating home produces less waste than eating out or ordering food--all while it costs far less, too!
If you think having family meals is too much work, don't despair. You can get help for everything from meal planning to putting your weekly grocery shopping list together. Check out Dine Without Whine for kid-tested, quick recipes that will help you put together family meals with less effort. Dine Without Whine's weekly shopping lists will also help you get food shopping done much faster, and even save money on groceries.
I know it takes time. But it really is worth it to cook dinner for your family! I'm always amazed at how many memories revolve around food. So go cook and make some memories!
It is 9:00 a.m. and I just woke up. I guess I'm more jetlagged than I thought from being in Saskatchewan since Thursday.
And so I'm not going to do my typical morning routine. I let myself sleep in, and we're going to get started late, and I'm not going to apologize at all. Honestly. I don't feel one bit guilty. Really. Believe me yet?
It's a law of thermodynamics or something that "an object in motion tends to stay in motion". I remember learning that in school. But I don't think they're right when it comes to human beings. The pull is not to keep us in motion; the pull is to get us to sit on our butts. Let me explain.
It seems to me that the biggest challenge I have had of my entire life is trying to choose what I know is good for me. I'm not talking in the moral area, although that certainly is an issue. I mean in the general lifestyle area. We all know we should eat a healthy breakfast, but do I do it? We all know life works better with schedules, but do I stick to mine? We all know we should exercise regularly, but do we?
But it's not just that we know these things. It's also that they objectively make us feel better. After I exercise, for instance, I feel so alive for the rest of the day. I'm happier. I'm more confident. When I eat properly, I feel better. I'm less lethargic. I have more energy. When I do my devotions early in the day I have a spring in my step. I feel more peaceful.
There really isn't a downside to these things.
So why are they so hard to do?
So many mornings I sit here, at the computer, telling myself to get off and go exercise. I know I'll feel better when I'm done. I know it will put my day on a better footing. But do I? (Well, lately I do, because I'm getting better, but what amazes me is that even though I'm getting better, it's still a big struggle.)
While I was hanging out in the hotel room this weekend between speaking engagements I watched a lot of television (and knit a lot!). I tried to watch CSI, but that's just too gross for me. So I stuck to the Home and Garden channel and the Food Channel. I felt very ripped off because What Not to Wear was not on at all during my entire hotel stay, but there's little I can do about it now. But some of the British shows were interesting.
Two in particular followed two women with horrible lifestyle habits. They were tremendously obese, and to call what they ate "food" would be an insult to actual food. They smoked and didn't exercise. And over the course of a few months they were to radically change.
It is hard to break habits, even habits you know are bad for you. I have never smoked, but I imagine that quitting is agonizing. And here's the truth about all of these things: no matter how good it feels to do it, our bodies naturally want to take the easy way out. We tend to rebel against what we "should" do, even if what we "should" do makes us feel tremendous.
Isn't that silly? I guess it's one of the consequences of sin in this world. After all, it does make sense from a spiritual point of view. Our bodies are in rebellion against the perfect state in which we were created. And I don't think this only affects our moral decisions. I think it affects everything. It's why it's so hard to do the right thing even in our daily routines.
But I want to put a stop to that. I have realized this year that I need to do what gives me energy, and sitting in front of a computer screen, or eating ice cream for breakfast, doesn't cut it. I wish I could bottle up the feeling I get after I exercise, or after I cook a healthy meal, so that I could remind myself how good it would feel to "just do it", but I can't. I'm going to have to develop mental discipline instead, with God's help.
I do believe it helps, though, to remember that our bodies are always in rebellion. So we shouldn't really use them as a good guide. Of course they're tired and don't want to go for a jog; that doesn't mean you shouldn't. Of course you crave a Diet Pepsi; that doesn't mean you should give in to that aspartame. We don't have to listen to our bodies. We can rise above them.
Yesterday on Wifey Wednesday we talked about food--what to do when your husband wasn't very adventurous in the menu department, and wasn't willing to try food that you liked--or food that was healthy.
One woman left this comment:
let me just say that all of you with husbands who try things are lucky! my husband REFUSES to try anything that he thinks he won't like. the only "vegetables" that he will eat are corn & potatoes. he says that he "tolerates" green beans, but in 7 1/2 years together I have never once seen him "tolerate" one. he will not eat things that are mixed together (i.e. casseroles, soups other than tomato), does not like noodles or rice, and will not try any new "ethnic" dishes. (i have gotten him to try chinese...but only sweet & sour & general tsos chicken...no noodles, no rice). I, on the other hand, am quite a foodie and love trying new things. I adore sushi, mexican food--i will try anything once and usually like it. i basically have to make separate things for us each to eat at night. we have no kids yet but I'm already stressed about that issue. he just refuses to budge. occasionally I will try to get him to eat something that he likes with something that he may not like added to it, but he will very rarely do it (I got him to try a spoonful of french onion soup once...but he only had the broth w/the bread and cheese). i feel like i am dealing with a child sometimes, and what i don't get is, his mother will say stuff about not knowing why he is like that and I just want to scream "Because you didn't make him try new things!!!!" it's so frustrating.
I'm at a loss as to how to help her without just repeating some of the things I said yesterday. So let me take the collective wisdom of the mom-blogosphere. What do you think? Any advice? Any caution? Any thoughts? Leave a comment!
I have my meals planned this week. But rather than posting my plan (it's just pasta Monday, fish Tuesday, meatless on Wednesday, frozen leftovers on Thursday), I thought I'd post my rationale for eating together.
When I was out walking recently, my daughter Katie said to me, "You know what I like about our family, Mommy? We eat together."
It's such a little thing, but when the girls have friends over, it's amazing how many confess that it's a new experience for them. Most people eat in front of the TV, or they grab dinner on the run.
And that's not good. It's over food that we connect, talk, share, and bond.
But I know meal planning takes time, especially when everyone has busy schedules. But it is more important for your family to eat dinner together at least 3 times a week than it is for your kids to all be in soccer, or to all be on the baseball team. Family trumps sports. It really does. As adults, kids will remember sitting with family and the relationships that grew from that far more than they will anything else.
If you don't have time to eat dinner together, you're doing something wrong. You have to change your schedule. No ifs, ands, or buts. And if you don't believe me, read on! Here are 10 benefits from eating together:
It's Good for the Body!
1. When families eat together, everyone tends to eat healthier. People who have frequent family meals consume more calcium, fiber, iron, and vitamins B6, B12, C and E. It could be because home-cooked meals are healthier than fast food and restaurant meals. (Source: Archives of Family Medicine)
2. Children tend to eat more fruits and vegetables when they frequently have dinner with their families. They also tend to eat fewer snack foods. (Source: American Dietetic Association) When we eat all together, we cook meatloaf with veggies on the side or we make stew. When the kids eat alone, we heat up chicken fingers. Not good.
3. Children in families who eat dinner together are less likely to be overweight (Source: Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine). I think this is also because parents are watching what they eat! And when we snack in front of the TV, we eat way more than if we were sitting at a table.
Good For The Brain
4. Children from families who eat meals together get better grades than their peers who don't have lots of family meal times (Source: Lou Harris-Reader's Digest National Poll).
5. When families eat together frequently, children have better language skills compared to kids from families who don't have family mealtimes often. (Source: Harvard University) TV doesn't teach language skills well. When we eat at the table, kids hear their parents talking to each other, too. It's great!
Good For Emotional Health
6. Children of families who eat together report feeling happier and are more optimistic about the future, than their peers who have infrequent family meals. (Source: Lou Harris- Reader's Digest National Poll)
7. Teenagers are less likely to use drugs, smoke, and drink alcoholic drinks, when their families eat together regularly. (Source: Columbia University) I read this study a few years ago and have quoted it frequently. When we eat dinner, we catch up with our kids. They know we care. So they're less likely to give in to peer pressure!
8. It may come as a surprise, but among Moms who work outside the home, those who have family mealtimes reported feeling less stress than those who had family dinners less often. (Source: Family and Consumer Sciences Research Journal) When we feel that our priorities are being met, we feel less stress.
9. The more often teen girls had meals with their families, the less likely they were to have symptoms of depression and suicidal behaviors. (Source: University of Minnesota) And fewer teenage pregnancies!
Good For Family Bonding
10. Eating together gives family members the chance to communicate and build relationships, something that both adults and children appreciate very much. (Source: Nutrition Education Network of Washington & Oprah Winfrey's "Family Dinner Experiment")
I hope these reasons motivate you and your family to try and eat together more often. We're all busy - even children have plenty of after-school activities. But as the list above shows, family meals are worth every effort we put into them.
It helps to plan ahead so that we're not scrambling to get dinner ready or panicking because we don't have all the ingredients we need. To make it easier to get the family around the table with a home-cooked meal, check out Dine Without Whine's menu planning service. It cost just a penny to try it out!
And check out Org Junkie every Monday for her Meal Plan Monday! But get eating
A few years ago I realized that I was gaining about 3 pounds a year. I was 10 pounds heavier than I had been a few years before that, and I thought I'd better do something about it. After all, 3 pounds a year is 30 pounds in a decade, and 60 pounds in 20 years. Not good.
So I started one of those low-carb diets for a few months, and the first thing they told me to do was to stop drinking milk and start drinking diet pop. I didn't like it much at first, and really missed the milk, but I made the switch.
I had never bought pop in my life to drink at home (I always bought it in restaurants, but that's different), but I wasn't supposed to have much milk.
I ended up leaving that diet, because I couldn't survive without the dairy and the fruit, and didn't really believe that was healthy. But in the meantime I had really become addicted to Diet Pepsi.
I've never been a coffee drinker, so the caffeine was lovely.
Since then, I've gained another four pounds, but that's over about five years and my weight is stabilizing or going down, so I'm happy. I'm working out more, and I really eat quite well. But I decided this year that the Diet Pepsi had to go. I don't like needing the caffeine, and I REALLY don't like the aspartame.
So it's gone. Quit cold turkey.
And I miss it!
Water just doesn't cut it. I tried Perrier, because at least it's carbonated. Boy, is that stuff gross. And I can't do coffee.
So I'm here with my pathetic water with lime or lemon squeezed into it, and I'm trying to talk myself into believing that it's just lovely and I'm ever so happy.
I'm not. But I know I made the right choice. It's amazing how much of life is like that, isn't it?
I have a confession to make. I was going into this weekend feeling Blah and Blech and Mad at the world.
You see, I had a perfect plan. I was going to end homeschooling last Friday, assign my kids work they could do on their own, and then spend a week working 10-hour days. I do that; I homeschool for a few weeks and then come back to my writing. I have a book proposal that I want to have finished in a few weeks, and I'm editing all my audio for all the talks I've ever done. I'm about half way through, but the talks are much better now with all the extra stuff that was only relevant for that day taken out.
Anyway, then I found out that family was visiting this week and wrecking my plans. I was mad. I was grumpy.
And then I got a grip. This is Christmas! It's about family! And they're only here until Friday. So what I've decided is that over the next four days I am going to go for hikes with my kids and my family, Christmas shop, finish all my presents, play a ton of games, and maybe knit a lot. All the stuff I was planning to do next week when my work is done. And then I'll just do my work on the 22nd and 23rd.
It's pretty stupid to feel resentful about family when family is what Christmas is about, isn't it?
So I'm also going to make some nice meals this week that my visitors will enjoy, and that my kids will.
Here we go:
Monday: Spaghetti. It's an oldie but a goodie, and the kids can make it themselves. That's a bonus!
Tuesday: Chicken in Honey Mustard Sauce. I made this last week and it was awesome.
Chicken thighs, skin & bone removed
3/4 cup honey mustard (I just mixed dijon & honey together)
1/2 cup orange juice
1 TBSP cider vinegar
1 tsp worcestershire sauce
1 clove garlic
1/2 can green chilies (the small little cans you buy beside the salsa aisle. Or you can use a jalapeno instead. It really isn't that spicy in the end.)
Cook in slow cooker on low for 5-6 hours. It was so good!
Wednesday: Stew in the Crockpot. I'm big on crockpots. That way we can shop and hike in the afternoon and I don't have to worry about getting dinner ready.
Thursday: Grilled Salmon. The best thing about family visiting is that my family likes fish. My own kids and husband do not. But I can force feed it to them when visitors are here, so there! Ha!
I'm going to marinate it in a soy sauce-honey mixture and top with green onions. I like it better slightly sweet.
Friday: Baked Potatoes with toppings. My kids' favourite meal, and they can make this one, too! Just bake enough for two potatoes each, and serve with crumbled bacon, salsa, cheese, sour cream, green onions, butter, and whatever else you can think of. I choose the lower fat version and do mostly salsa and green onions, and they're really good!
This weekend is our anniversary, so I'm assuming I'm being taken out. The kids can have pasta.
And we will do some baking this week, too, if only because I think my family is visiting because they don't get real "family" experiences very often, and they like being with my kids. So we're going to do lots of family type things to get in the mood for Christmas. Plus I like chocolate!
Just returned from the grocery store where I bought leeks! It is my:
Vegetable of the Week!
Allow me to explain.
I always figure variety is better in your diet. If you think about it, 150 years ago people ate a much bigger variety of meat (at least North Americans did) than we do. They had bear and deer and goose and duck and beef and chicken and fish. Whatever they could catch or grow.
Today we have beef, chicken, pork, and maybe fish.
So I've been adding emu and lamb and venison. Not so keen on the venison, but if I mix it with lots of beef it's not bad. The emu is amazing.
But we really should be doing the same thing with veggies, and sometimes I feel like I get into a rut.
So every week I'm going to buy a new vegetable and explore what to do with it. This week's is leeks. Any suggestions? I'm working towards leek and potato soup myself, but if anyone wants to steer me someplace, I'm willing to go!
To celebrate Menu Plan Monday and Christmas, I have a present for you.
I am going to talk about how to teach kids to cook so you don't have to!
Here's my philosophy in a nutshell:
Each year after 10, they learn to make one meal per year.
So at 11 they can make 1. At 12 they can make 2. At 13 they can make 3.
And so on, and so on, and so on.
That way, when they move out at 18, the goal is that they can make seven different meals well, and one meal for company. A more fancy one! Get it?
And this applies to BOTH girls and boys. Do not raise your sons differently from your daughters in this regard. First of all, the average boy doesn't marry until 27, so that's 9 years away from home first, unless you want him living in your basement and eating your food the whole time.
Even when he does marry, do you really want your daughter-in-law to have to do all the cooking? So train him for independence! You're doing everyone a favour!
So how do you figure out the meals to make? Let me do a different Menu Plan Monday to demonstrate:
Year 11: Spaghetti. It's easy, and most kids like it. You can start my just teaching them to make the pasta and heat up a can of sauce with some meat. Then teach them how to add some chopped veggies, like garlic or carrots or peppers. Then add some homemade garlic bread (just chop fresh garlic up, add it to butter with some parsley, and spread it on bread. Broil it, and you're done! Just check the timer. I'm forever burning mine).
Year 12: Chicken pie/chicken rice casserole. This is one of my children's favourite meals, so we taught this young. And it's not that difficult:
Add leftover chicken 1 can cream of something soup (whatever is in your cupboard) 1 cup gravy (leftover, or the instant kind, or a can) a lot of frozen veggies, or chopped fresh carrots, etc.
Heat it all up, and then either put it in some pie shells and bake it, or add rice to it, add a bit of sour cream, sprinkle with cheese and breadcrumbs, and cook as a rice casserole. It's great either way!
Year 13: Chicken and potatoes (so they now have the leftover chicken to make the above. But most kids feel very threatened by making a whole chicken, plus they think the meat is gross, so it's best to leave this until a little bit later).
The benefits of learning how to roast a chicken is that your realize how easy it is! And if you teach them how to make different side dishes, from baked potatoes to mashed potatoes or rice, then they're all set. Now no matter which meat they roast they can make a meal! Gravy is a little trickier, but Rebecca's getting not too bad at it right now.
Year 14: Grilled ham. We make ours dipped in maple syrup and then grilled in a frying pan or on the barbecue, depending on the time of year. The kids love it! And we usually splurge on the Lipton's sidekicks for this meal.
Year 15: Shepherd's Pie. Again, it's easy. But I leave it until later because I always find this meal takes a bit of time because of all the peeling of potatoes and chopping and mashing, and the kids don't like doing that work as much. But here's our recipe:
Brown 1 1/2 pounds ground beef. Add 1 tin of tomato soup 1 tsp worcestershire sauce a bunch of garlic powder and salt and paprika
Layer this in a pan. Cover with frozen veggies. Add mashed potatoes on top of that. Sprinkle with paprika. Bake at 400 for half and hour. If it's not brown on top, broil for a minute or two.
We've started tripling this recipe and making three pans, because the kids love it and we leave it for leftovers.
So there you have five days of meals for your teens and preteens to start learning to make! That's also our recipe plan for this week. But notice that none of these recipes costs very much. They're all very affordable, and the kids like them. And one day, when they're on their own, they'll feel competent!
What recipes do you use to teach children how to cook? And how are they doing at it?
It's time for Menu Plan Monday again, brought to you by Org Junkie!
This week is mildly crazy for me because I'm speaking in Waterloo tonight, which is 3 and a bit hours from where I live. And the weather isn't supposed to be great, so I may have to sleep over. So no dinner tonight.
We have meetings on Tuesday & Thursday, and I'm having kids over Friday and Saturday. So I think I'm just going to make some easy crockpot recipes for dinner most nights. Some stews and some chicken over rice. My favourite chicken is really easy: just mix a tin of cream of chicken or mushroom or broccoli soup with a package of onion soup mix. It's really yummy.
The meals I care about more are lunches.
I'm getting seriously sick of sandwiches. So I want to write about what else you can make for lunch. The deal is it can't be expensive and it has to be easy to make.
We homeschool, so I try to have a hot lunch everyday (even with the sandwiches we eat soup). But sometimes I just don't know what to make.
So here are some thoughts:
Hummus & Pitas. I just love hummus. Have you ever made it? It's not hard. Just mix:
one tin chick peas 2 tbsp tahini (it's sesame seed paste and you can find it in the health food section) 3 cloves garlic 1 tbsp lemon juice olive oil (just pour it in little by little)
But you really need the right kind of mixer. I use one of those Procter Silex handheld blender thingies, and it's awesome. This stuff doesn't work well in a traditional blender. It will just stick to the sides.
Anyway, I love hummus, and so does my 11-year-old. The other kids don't, but at least it's something different for me.
Homemade Soup. I do this one a lot, too! Just save all your leftover chicken and beef in small containers in the freezer. Then buy some stock, or make it, and throw everything together. I add macaroni or shell pasta, some peas and carrots and corn, or any leftover veggies in the fridge, and voila! It's quite good, too.
And any time I make soup I cut up a ton of fresh vegetables with some dip. I buy dip mixes that make dip very easily, and the kids love it, so they'll eat a lot of it.
Macaroni and Cheese. The homemade kind, I mean. Make a white sauce with flour & milk, and then add grated cheese. Add garlic powder and a bit of mustard powder, and then mix it with some cooked macaroni. I'd eat it just like that, but my oldest daughter likes it baked so you can put breadcrumbs on top. I like it runnier so I prefer it right out of the pan. But it doesn't take that long, and it's much more nutritious than Kraft Dinner!
Salads. I'm starting to eat them for lunch, though the kids won't! But if you sprinkle sunflower seeds or chick peas on a green salad, you give it some protein and then you can call it a balanced lunch.
What do you do for lunches? I'd just like some other suggestions, because sometimes I get really bored!
Thanks for dropping by! Do stay and look around a bit. I have a great giveaway going on now, and some posts on marriage & motherhood!
Do any of you ever choose your meal plans based on what's about to go bad in your fridge?
That's what I've done this week, and it seems mildly pathetic. Why do I have this many things that are about to perish? Why can't I just eat them when I buy them, instead of buying things and then forget about them?
After all, that's what a menu plan is supposed to be for. You know what you're going to eat, so you make a grocery list based on that, and then you don't buy anything else. That way nothing goes bad!
But I always see stuff on sale. And I can't resist a bargain!
So a while ago I bought two 10-pound bags of carrots. What do you do with twenty pounds of carrots? It turns out you have to eat carrots every night. For months.
Our carrots have just about had it. So they're on the menu! So are our sad potatoes, which have disgusting eyes on them right now. They've got to go, too! Without further adieu, here is what we are eating:
Monday: Salmon. Hey, fish helps with memory, and my kids are doing tons of Bible memory this term! Of course, they hate fish. But they will eat it because I said so! I'll serve some green onions (also on their last legs) as a garnish. And some carrots. I have a yummy spice rub you just put on the fish that makes it taste great! And then add fresh lemon, and I enjoy it. Even if they don't!
Tuesday: Stew. Lots of carrots and potatoes in here! I'm doing it in the crock pot because I need to go out tomorrow afternoon to the Y, and I want dinner already cooking! I just cut up the beef, add some tomato paste, beef stock, and a bit of beer, and some pepper and a few herbs, and let it all cook. At the end I add a bit of sour cream. They key is to coat the beef in flour and herbs first and then brown it in a pan before adding it to the crockpot. And I'm throwing in some emu with it, because emu is healthy but always tastes better when it's cooked in liquid!
Wednesday: Meatloaf! I actually really enjoy meatloaf, and I'm going to make a 3-meat meatloaf this week! I have some ground venison, ground turkey, and ground beef. I'll add twice as much beef as anything else (because I actually don't like the taste of venison, but I'm hoping this hides it), and then we'll eat it with rice and--you guessed it--carrots! Mixing meats together is a good way to add a less fattening meat--say turkey--and not lose out on the taste. Family members usually don't even notice!
Thursday: Beef Pie. Rebecca's turn to cook! She likes making pies, and I have leftover beef to use up. Again, we'll add beef stock, gravy, peas, CARROTS, and whatever other vegetables are starting to look suspicious! I buy the ready made pie crusts for this. I know it's not healthy, but she's the one cooking, and I want her to get comfortable just mixing the stuff together before we have to worry about making a crust! For the inside, we literally grab any leftovers in the fridge and mix with a good gravy. Veggies, potatoes, meat, whatever. It's a great way to use them all up! And if you save bits of gravy in the freezer, you can add them together when you go to make a pie!
Friday: Company Day! So I'll make Asian Chicken Thighs. They always taste great, and company loves them!
So that's it for me! I'm just glad I got this done! I usually use Monday mornings to plan my week--my lesson plans for school, my menu plans, my grocery shopping, my errands, and today I just got off to a slow start. Didn't finish it until lunch time. But it's done!
Now to take my computer in to stop pornographic pop ups! Don't know where they came from, but I'm getting grossed out!
Just to give us some perspective on how great our world and our life is, no matter what you think of the election outcome this week, take a look at this:
They say that women's number one emotion is guilt--at any particular time we're feeling guilty about at least one thing. And if you don't think you're feeling guilty right now, if you think about it I'm sure you can talk yourself into it!
And the number one thing we feel guilty for, if surveys are to be believed, is our weight.
Here's a clip of a talk I gave recently on women and weight. I think it's pretty funny, but you can be the judge of that! I know that it's good to stay healthy, and I do say that in other parts of that same talk, but the main point I'm trying to make in the rest of this talk is how to keep our eyes on what is really important--namely receiving from God, and then passing His blessings on to others.
Every Friday my syndicated parenting column appears in a variety of newspapers. Here's today's.
Cow bells are especially useful in the country. Not only do they warn of oncoming bovines, but they can summon the family from far and wide to dinner. Friends of mine hang one prominently by their back door.
The urban counterpart to the cow bell is that image of Mom leaning out the door and yelling, “Dinner!” to her various children scattered around the neighbourhood. Unfortunately, that seems like a throwback to a bygone era. In our busy lives, many of us have abandoned eating home-cooked meals together. Grocery stores and fast food outlets have freed us from this time honoured tradition, so that we can grab dinner on the run, heating up a frozen Mexican enchilada, or even gourmet Indian Butter Chicken, as we dash out the door to another meeting, another lesson, another midnight shift.
Not too many June Cleavers remain. But let’s remember that it wasn’t just the perfectly coiffed June who organized these family rituals. Almost every family, tight sweatered or not, once enjoyed this tradition. In the days when buying dinner out far exceeded most family budgets, people cooked from scratch. And then they sat down together, passed the potatoes, and dug in.
Television was the first thing that killed family dinners. Instead of talking, people started watching. And soon conversation died. Once we gave up on the benefits of talking together, little was left. When frozen foods came on the market, home cooking died, too. And soon our schedules became so haphazard that herding everyone together was a struggle.
I wonder, though, how many of us have ever calculated the cost? Most of my generation grew up eating dinner with our families. We learned certain skills that we now take for granted. But many of those skills our children will not learn, because they no longer have the opportunity to learn them.
Take, for instance, the idea of “waiting until dinner” to eat. When 4:30 hit and I was hungry for a cookie, my mother wouldn’t let me indulge because dinner would be served in 45 minutes, and it was out of the question to ruin one’s dinner. If dinner is not going to be served, though, but instead can just be heated up on a whim, children eat whenever they want. No longer do they have to train their appetites to wait. If their bodies want it, they get it. Does this have repercussions in areas other than eating?
And what about the idea of taking one’s turn? Sitting with six people around the table meant that you couldn’t all grab the mashed potatoes at the same time. You had to decide to pass all to the right, or all to the left, and you had to wait until they arrived, unless you were smart enough to set the table yourself and position the potatoes right in front of your own plate. Sharing and waiting one’s turn is almost as outdated now as June Cleaver. As long as you’re the one standing by the microwave, the food’s all yours.
Conversation skills are also eroding. At the dinner table you have to wait your turn to speak, and you have to listen to others. Take away the dinner table, and children’s main conversations occur with friends on the phone, online, or on the playground. The rules of etiquette our grandmothers championed are sadly lacking there.
Without family dinners children don’t learn not to burp at the table, or to keep one’s bottom firmly in one’s seat, or not to interrupt each other. They don’t have to learn how to keep an uninteresting conversation going, how to relate to a sullen sibling, or how to describe what happened in school. As a child I had to ask to be excused; I couldn’t just leave when I wanted to, much as I may have desired to escape during those long Christmas dinners when my grandfather waxed on about the latest Matlock episode. And it did me good.
Family dinners aren’t just about food. They’re about family; they’re about life; they’re about civil society. We’re throwing something far too precious away for the lure of the tube, or the beckoning of the drive thru. I think we need more cow bell.
Don't miss a Reality Check! Sign up here to receive it free in your inbox every week!
I'm in the middle of writing a column about the importance of family dinners, and I really wanted to include some of the amazing observations of Theodore Dalrymple (real name Anthony Daniels) who has worked as a psychiatrist in the British penal system.
He has written an essay on family meals, "The Starving Criminal", that can be read here. Unfortunately he didn't make the cut. When you have only 700 words to work with, you can't always be as profound as you may wish. But what he wrote is worth further attention.
Here's part of his take on the link between criminality and family meals:
In fact, he told me that he had never once eaten at a table with others in the last 15 years. Eating was for him a solitary vice, something done almost furtively, with no pleasure attached to it and certainly not as a social event. The street was his principal dining room, as well as his trash can: and as far as food was concerned, he was more a hunter-gatherer than a man living in a highly evolved society.
Far from being unique, his story was typical of those that I have heard hundreds—no, thousands—of times. Another young man, also expelled from home at an early age because his new stepfather, only a few years older than he, found him surplus to requirements, had been obliged to drift from friend’s house to friend’s house for six years. Unfitted by training or education for any particular job, he had worked only casually, for a few weeks at a time, and so never had the financial stability to pay rent on a place of his own (in conditions of shortage, public housing goes preferentially to young single women with children, and he had made the situation worse by having two children of his own by two young women). Needless to say, he had no domestic skills either, never having been taught any; and his friends, coming from the same social milieu, were just as undomesticated. They too ate in an unsocial fashion and expected him to fend nutritionally for himself, which he did by eating chocolate, the only food he could remember having eaten with any consistency over the last few years. Apart from his time in prison (for stealing from cars), he hadn’t eaten a meal in a decade. It can’t be long before someone suggests that the solution to a problem like this is to fortify chocolate with minerals and vitamins.
There is a cultural phenomenon going on here where food as a socially positive ritual is abandoned. I'm going to go out on a limb and say something for which I have very little socially scientific research (if there is such a thing), but I feel it in my gut.
Food is what separates functional families from dysfunctional families. Think about it this way: in order to cook a decent meal, you have to know how to read a recipe. You have to be motivated enough to go to a grocery store. You have to actually cook the meal and serve it. Then, you all have to sit at a table together (Dalrymple claims that 34% of British families do not own a dining table) and eat it. It provides time for you to connect, to talk, to learn that others care about you, and to learn important manners. That's what I'm talking about in my column next week, so I'm not going to dwell on it here.
But if you cook home-cooked meals, you're more likely to be healthy and less likely to be overweight. In other words, it means that parents care about the children's health; are organized enough to give the children a schedule; are careful with their budget; and want to connect as a family.
Too many families don't cook anymore. They reheat frozen food and that's not the same thing. It means that the families aren't giving priority to something that is so conducive to family togetherness.
Interestingly, I think one of the reasons many people are poor and stay poor is that they lack basic food skills, like cooking and scheduling, and they lack the motivation to go acquire those skills. I taught myself to cook from a cookbook. I read tons of cookbooks when I was in university. I used to get them out of the library. And that's how I became a good cook. It didn't cost me anything; money wasn't the issue. It was motivation combined with some basic life skills.
I have a friend who is a dietician, and when she worked for the Public Health Unit she often put on information nights called "2 can dine for $1.99", and stuff like that, where they taught basic recipes and cooking for inexpensive but healthy meals. They advertised in the welfare office, in the unemployment office, and with Children's Aid. And you know who came? Homeschoolers with their parents. Their parents thought: hey, great way to teach my kids some extra life skills! So they missed their target audience entirely because their target audience didn't care.
And because they didn't care, they were in that bracket of her target audience. If they did care, it's unlikely they would have stayed poor.
I know that sounds judgmental, but I think poverty and crime have become cultural issues, not economic ones. We aren't teaching people the value of relationships, and we aren't teaching people motivation, and we aren't teaching people life skills. And after a certain time, they fail to want to acquire these things.
In relation to all this, and tied in with my recent item on Learned Helplessness, I thought his next to concluding paragraph to be right on the mark:
The liberal intelligentsia has several reasons for failing to see or admit the cultural dimension of malnutrition in the midst of plenty—in failing to see its connection with an entire way of life—and in throwing the blame instead onto the supermarket chains. One reason is to avoid confronting the human consequences of the changes in morals, manners, and social policy that it has consistently advocated. The second is to avoid all appearance of blaming people whose lives are poor and unenviable. That this approach leads it to view those same people as helpless automata, in the grip of forces that they cannot influence, let alone control—and therefore as not full members of the human race—does not worry the intelligentsia in the least. On the contrary, it increases the importance of the elite’s own providential role in society. To blame the supermarket chains is implicitly to demand that the liberal and bureaucratic elite should have yet more control over society.
About Me: I'm a Christian author of a bunch of books, and a frequent speaker to women's groups and marriage conferences. Best of all, I love homeschooling my daughters, Rebecca and Katie. And I love to knit. Preferably simultaneously.
Stumble It!
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=e2deb043-8795-41fd-b133-dc4576dca915)
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=a4feb107-4ce2-48e3-b230-68275ce4a6a3)
