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Question: What Do You Do When Your Husband Stinks? Literally, I Mean
Okay, girls. I have a question this weekend for you to answer! It was sent to me by someone who was responding to my Wifey Wednesday post, saying that she does try to be pretty for her husband, but he doesn't reciprocate.

He wears dirty clothes (he has a dirty job), he doesn't always shower after work, and he doesn't always shave. But he still thinks she should be romantic.

That sounds just gross to me, but I think we've all had times when he wants to kiss and hug or maybe something more, but we recoil because he hasn't brushed his teeth in ages.

So what do you do? How do you break it to him? How do you ask him to have better hygiene? What do you do when he stinks? I only have a few thoughts, but I'd like to hear yours first, and then I'll write a follow-up. So don't leave without commenting!

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14 Comments:

At 11:04 AM , Blogger Mrs. E said…

She could suggest to him that they take a shower together every morning or night. She could also bring their toothbrushes in the shower with them. ;-)

 

At 2:51 PM , Blogger Katy-Anne Binstead said…

My husband is great about showers but he will NOT brush his teeth and then he wants to make out. No way! EWW.

 

At 5:53 PM , Blogger AlaneM said…

My hubby also has a dirty job & dosen't always shower &/or shave. I used to just deal with it but found I started to resent him. So now I'm just blunt & say "you stink, go take a shower dude!" Or "ugh, go brush your teeth." He doesn't always appriciate it at the time but he sure does afterword!!!

 

At 6:51 PM , Blogger Rick Beagle said…

If you want the male perspective, quit thinking about it and just tell him.

Men aren't that subtle, and any process that strives to be sensitive is doomed to failure. Put some toothpaste on a toothbrush and send him like an errant child to the bathroom.

If he makes a fuss, call his Mom....

Warmest Regards.
An American Liberal

 

At 8:51 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said…

I agree w/the last blogger. I would also add How would you like me be dirty? Maybe she shouldn't shave or shower. He expects her to be clean. What goes around comes around.

 

At 9:38 PM , Blogger Melissa, Multi-Tasking Mama said…

I am so glad that I didn't have any type of drink in my mouth when the title of that post came up or I would now be cleaning my laptop screen LOL... anywhoo, my husband is an electrician and particularly in the summer time needs a shower before coming to the dinner table let alone touching me. Early in our relationship I told him that a good way to wind down after a long day at work would be a shower and I always have a pack of gum in my purse and by the bed. I agree with the male commenter that men are oblivious to subtlety. Lovingly tell him "you stink" and I can't be turned on with BO in th room so GO clean up :-)

 

At 11:01 PM , Blogger Shari said…

I'm a front door girl.
You shower - you shave - you brush.... and then we'll talk or whatever! :)

 

At 8:30 AM , Blogger Marlo Boux said…

My husband and I have the kind of relationship where directness is just fine. Besides, he often doesn't "get" subtle cues. So I just flat out tell him that he is stinky and hygeine isn't optional. LOL. He doesn't argue it :)

 

At 10:45 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said…

I agree with the direct method. Just tell him what you need and what his reward will be for doing so. Easy peasy!

 

At 9:24 AM , Blogger Dena said…

My husband farms so dirty and smelly are daily occurances around here. He knows to not even come within sniffing distance of me until he's showered. There have even been occasions where it's been so bad that he has stripped down in the garage and leaves his nasty clothes outside. After he showers he hoses off his clothes before putting them right into the washer. He's good about that.

 

At 9:29 AM , Blogger Elspeth said…

What a funny post title!

No advice (my hubby's a neatnik, and that goes for his person as well as his surroundings), but I think the direct approach would probably be best, since that generally how men communicate.

Make it clear: a clean body will lead to more "contact" with said body.

 

At 11:17 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said…

I agree with Mrs. E. My husband is in the military and often stinks after a hard day of training. I find that showering together allows you to start the romance sooner and encourages him to want to be clean for you. That way he knows that you want to be with him but also knows that you want him to be clean. It works for me!

 

At 9:31 AM , Blogger faerieeva said…

A few days late, but hoping to add an idea. Directness is fun, but adding some humour in it can take the sting out of the 'you stink'.
An "oooh... my big strong man has been out in the fields all day. How about a shower first" with batted lashes and a wide 'but you just wait till afterwards because I am sooo going to be waiting for you with not many clothes on' smile on your face.
Only works when this kind of banter is part of your relationship though.

 

At 4:03 PM , Blogger Coop de Coop said…

My husband also has a dirty job and we have encountered a similar problem since the beginning of our marriage. I used to tell him he was stinky, but his feelings would get hurt. So, over the years we have developed a little code. I say, "Wow, you must have worked really hard today." It lets him know what a strong, hard working man I think he is (and that he needs a shower).

 
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Name: Sheila

Home: Belleville, Ontario, Canada

About Me: I'm a Christian author of a bunch of books, and a frequent speaker to women's groups and marriage conferences. Best of all, I love homeschooling my daughters, Rebecca and Katie. And I love to knit. Preferably simultaneously.

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